Tag Archives: Terrorism



Source Image : http://www.telegraph.co.uk

Run. Run.


Every nerve in my entire body scream. If they had lung, they would take a very good use to it. I kinda grateful, they don’t. My whole body shivers of the tickling sensation suddenly rush into my blood. The energy suddenly came uninvited overrule the logic of my brain. Sensation so ecstatic, yet horrifying.

This house is empty, but there seems every sound decided to make an assembly. Converged in the center of the room. The ticking sound of clock, the whirl of summer breeze wind, the leaves brushed each other, the faint of people’s voice from distance might be so far away.

Have you ever done yourself consecutively 48 hours sleepless? It felt like every pore of your skin wide open, accepting everything that crawls over it. Like a fanatics accepting each and every word from their heroes. No need to filtrate, they just believe.

And their brain became meaningless. Only instincts.

I close my eyes, absorb every sensation, every sensory, my brain has magnetized them all. Built them up inside my mind, create one big fuss of tornado. I want them to stop, I want them to stay. I love them, yet I’m afraid of them.

Water will calm them down. I feel like floating, walk thoughtlessly to the bathroom. I splash my face with the transparent crystal water. They are purifying the lost soul. Wash every dirt, every germs of life. “I gotta do this,” the sound of whisper so loud in my ear. “I am the chosen one.”

I am the chosen one.

They tell me that I am special. They tell me I am the chosen one. So, I gotta do this. I will be the hammer of the God. The messenger of the world that has been so corrupted. The bag pack is ready. It is only a simple bag pack. Just like me, we are sharing the resemblance. At one glance, no one will recognize us. They kept passing by, never care, took no notice. Don’t you think it will be the day that everyone understands us? That we are matter. That we are valuable.

“Come, my friend. We will be one.”

To Sarinah(1) we go. To consign the commandment of God people started to forget. More so, they started to forget God. How come I forgive such a sin?

It feels like floating, I can’t feel my leg. I can’t feel anything but big fuss of tornado attacking my mind. Blinding my vision as I come into the van that take me to the location. The sacred place we chose to execute the God’s will. They told me so, I will just believe them.

My eyes wide open. I found myself in the middle of open street. Big road of Sarinah. Everyone is finally looking at me, consider me, acknowledge me. They are running around frantically, policemen surrounded me and my only friend. Two persons, that’s all you need to bring out the ruckus.

I feel my pulse beating like crazy. My heart is thumping out. Under the big wide open sky, the sun shine upon me like the enormous endless spotlight. The policemen, they’re trying to stop me.

Don’t they understand? I don’t want to be stopped. Nor be forgiven. I will be forever in your mind, stuck like a parasite that invade your nightmares. I want you to be scared, I want you to remind me, forever.

God, make me yours. Make me matter. 

Footnote :

(1) At January 14th, 2016, two people attacked Sarinah, Central Jakarta, Indonesia, terrorizing people with suicidal bombs and gunfire.



Silhouette of soldier
Source image : expatfinancial.com

It seems the whole world, once again, in the uproar. She can clearly remember as it happened only yesterday, President of United States Bill Clinton attacked the training Camp of Osama bin Laden in Afghanistan due to revenge on his attack towards the World Trade Center Tower in USA.

Many speculations. No proves. Muslims keep being blamed for everything happened. No matter whether they agreed or not on Osama’s famous terrible opinion.

Sabhira shrug into silence. Muslim society in New York make a very great effort lately to introduce Islam as peaceful religion. It falls apart. It may become useless. She can’t help to shed the tear. It’s only one small drop of the glistening crystal, but her heart was burst much more.

ISIS had beheaded one journalist from USA. Just one thing that Muslim society needs in New York, more hates. There are more demonstration by natives, tried to deport every Muslim immigrants, the society they most afraid of.

Who can blame them?

Her cell phone rings. “Did you hear the news?” asked her friend, her colleagues in their society. Yes, of course she heard the news. No one can avoid it, even if they wanted to. It’s all over the country, worse, all over the world.

Sabhira can’t help but whisper even though she’s not sure why, “we better reduce our program for a little while. To give people more time.”

“It’s only make our efforts seem useless.” Her friend got the point, but she is not sure of anything else right now.

“What can we do? Let’s not increase their fear, let’s not encourage their trauma. We need to calm down. Take a little time off. Well, it doesn’t mean we will stop thoroughly.”

It’s a shame. But, what can they do? Pushing their beliefs to people who’s being traumatized only aggravates the hates more. Let’s not. Sabhira doesn’t understand, where did radical Muslims organization, like ISIS, go wrong?

Beheaded innocent people. Declare war onto the people who didn’t do any harm. There’s not any ayah(1) stated it in Holy Koran(2). Of course, there is a statement of Allaah’s wrath in one of Surah(3). But, it’s only because the enemy of Islam break the ceasefire agreement.

Islam never to be the first to declare a war. That’s what Sabhira knows for sure. If anyone does good, Muslims must do good, too. No matter who, no matter what their belief is. In her prayer this dawn, she carefully invokes her intention to her God.

The scary thing is, whatever happened outside, we will only can go on. Grieve can’t stop anything.

So, Sabhira puts on her hijab. Broken white, the purity that’s been stained. That what she wants to wear. Funny. She sighs to her reflection in the mirror. She’s ready to go. To conquer another day. For the last time, she glances at the mirror. Her reflection becomes blurry as she moves.

Her feet feels heavy, but she’s ready to go. To every stares of hates. She feels humiliated by herself for being such a coward. She steps further, faster. This, someday will pass by, become a maybe black memory, but it will pass by. And everyone will live on.

She moves only forward.

New York are busy as always. People are moving to and fro at the pedestrian walk. Some achieving their dreams, some creating a life. Sabhira walks as always. But, it just seems different. He glances to her back. Once. Twice.

And she’s sure now. There’s some guy, a big bearded white guy, follows her step. Maybe it’s only her imagination. There are many people are walking toward the same direction of hers. But, why does it feel so different? A moment later, Sabhira knows why.

“Hey, you terrorist!” yelled the big guy. Not only Sabhira, almost everyone takes a trouble to look at him. Sabhira can see he’s grinning. And she’s sure now. The grinning is for her only.

The guy moves fast toward her. Closer, and closer. Sabhira doesn’t have an opportunity to run away. Not even to think. He gets closer, and closer.

She can see a blaze of beautiful reddish orange color flashes into her face. And everything becomes dark.

Footnote :

(1) Arabic term for verse

(2) Holy book of Islam

(3) Arabic term for chapters



Writer’s note :

Let’s create a world of peace, no matter what belief we hold on to